The Infinite Merits of Being With Haruhi
by hayclover
Summary: To Ootori Kyouya, a romantic relationship with Fujioka Haruhi whom everyone so adores might not necessarily bring him any merits. However, one thing is for sure: keeping her near him will. A collection of drabbles in AR & AU.


_A/N: I've been rewatching and rereading Ouran lately, and ever since I saw again the scene where Kyo and Haruhi both agree there would be no merits for the former on their being together, a lot of random opposing fluffs for Kyo have just kept popping into my head. Though the title says, "Infinite", I'll be numbering each drabble just for easier access and maintenance. :P_

* * *

**The Infinite Merits of Being With Haruhi**

...ooOooo...

**I. A New Light **

**1**

**With Haruhi near him, he knows his IQ is always higher.**

He stood there scribbling his notebook rather violently, as his club mates gave Fujioka Haruhi a makeover. Tamaki was practically one of the world's biggest idiots, so how could Tamaki have scored higher than him in today's test? He couldn't have gotten dumber.

He cast an alarmed look at his best friend. Could it be that the little brain inside Tamaki had finally grown to match the size of his huge yellow head? That could become a problem.

He was lost deep in thoughts when the innovated Fujioka, dragged by the man responsible for his headache, appeared cluelessly in front of him. She looked more like a female now, and he had to admit she was an attractive creature despite her underdeveloped chest. But why was she wearing a male's uniform?

"Mommy! This is our new member! From now on, he will be under my training."

He? He stared at Tamaki for a few seconds after which his eyes traveled to the other members, who looked just as equally excited.

He grinned pleasantly. "That's great," he said—great that it was all just a miscalculation, and he was simply overthinking. He gave Fujioka an questionable smile of acknowledgement before returning to work.

Never mind that little test. After all, it was official: not just Tamaki, but the rest of them were idiots.

If not, at least, not smarter than he was.

...ooOooo...

**2**

**With Haruhi near him, there is an excuse to be "lazy".**

His constant, discreet glances towards her weren't for no reason. Of course, being practically the man doing just about everything else that Tamaki was supposed to be doing, it was also his obligation to look after the welfare of the members, including Fujioka Haruhi's. Not that he was complaining—he had to admit, with her around, things have turned all the more interesting. What he hadn't noticed, however, was the personal effect the newbie influenced upon him until Tamaki called him one day.

"Kyouya," his lordship called worriedly.

He looked up. "Yes?"

"Is everything alright?"

"Of course. Why do you ask?"

Tamaki frowned. "Well for one, you haven't complained to me lately even though I called on your house with the entire club everyday. You also haven't settled any accounts our clubs have made or published any new promotions yet. Also, I heard you've been spacing out a lot lately."

Kyouya fixed his glasses as he tried to remember his recent lethargy. Tamaki was right. "It must be because Haruhi has been a bit of a distraction lately. The first day she arrived, she broke an eight-million vase. Then, she chased away a regular customer—the lost profits which I will of course have to add to her debt—and she also managed to waste money on coffee that would be below the standards of even a regular commoner," he answered honestly. "I suppose while it is your job to train her, it is mine to keep track of her debts. We wouldn't want her to live a difficult life, would we?"

"Say no more!" Tamaki replied, suddenly jubilant. "Daddy understands. Mommy's simply doing her job. Haruhi, you should treasure her more," he ordered the exasperated girl, who was just meters away and had heard everything.

Haruhi sighed, as Tamaki skipped away. "Kyouya-senpai, I know your work can sometimes be stressful, but please don't use me as an excuse to be lazy."

Lazy? He repeated in his mind. Being the workaholic he was, never was he described in such a manner his entire life, but perhaps it was the right word for his current state. He smiled. "That's quite an interesting thought."

...ooOooo...

**3**

**With Haruhi near him, he seems "more human" to the staffs in the house.**

The Ootori maids always fussed that their little master was like a robot. They'd dote on him, but his constant stoic nature was far from cute at all. So when a female friend visited alongside his usual group of friends, they had hoped she would make him "more human," by piquing some human feelings more than what the host club members would usually do.

And she did.

"Kyouya-sama," one of his maids greeted cheerfully only to have her smile vanish just as quickly as the tray slipped from her hands.

The room was a mess. Clothes were clustered here and there; papers were scattered all over the floor; and the bed was rolled over. Right in the middle of the sofa sat her young master, silently deciding whether or not to smash into pieces the porcelain model of him dressed in female Hawaiian clothes—something Tamaki-sama lovingly sent a few years ago.

Kyouya turned his head slightly around and she froze. "What is it?" he asked dryly. She could almost see the multiple layers of dark aura surrounding him. It was like being in the same room with a demon.

"I—I'll come back later. My apologies for disturbing you!" she quickly replied, as she darted out of the room. She dared not even look at his face.

And she ran off, partly out of extreme fear and on a greater part, out of excitement, to tell the news to everyone.

Interestingly, a whole new level of wrath just came into the Ootori household.

...ooOoo...

**4**

**With Haruhi near him, the robots have a playmate.**

His favorites were Jun-san and Satoshi-san. Jun would bully Tamaki while Satoshi would confuse the obnoxious Hitachiin brothers. As long as they were around, life was more than just machines and chemicals—just like Pokemon.

Their favorites were he and Haruhi. He would feed them with oil while Haruhi would spend some time playing with them. As long as they were around, life was more than just machines and chemicals—just like humans.

But lately, Haruhi hadn't been visiting them, and it was starting to get on their electrons.

"Otoo-sama," Jun rasped, trying to grab Kyouya, who was reading the latest scientific journal, by his lab gown from below.

"What is the problem?"

"We miss Okaa-chan," Satoshi whined, grabbing Kyouya's white dress from the other side.

Kyouya almost spilled his coffee. "Okaa-chan? Who's Okaa-chan? I don't remember marrying anyone yet," he replied calmly.

The two little robots produced identical metallic rings they figured would fit their favorite people's fingers. They handed them to their father.

"Then marry her already," Jun demanded. "She's the smart, pretty and nice girl. She cooks good food, makes you happy, makes those idiots' lives miserable..."

Satoshi nodded beside him. "And she plays with us."

"Marry her, or you'll lose both of us."

"You don't mean Fujioka?" The dark-haired scientist stared at them and then at the badly-shaped rings. They must be getting rusty without her. "Alright. I'll call Tamaki and make the monthly invitation a weekly one."

And the robots rejoiced.

...ooOooo...

**5**

**With Haruhi near him, he is never the babysitter.**

There were some days when they were his friends, and there were some days when, in his eyes, they were just babies—inconvenient, bratty babies left in his charge.

Sadly, today was one of those latter days, and he felt he was about to have a migraine. He blinked only for a second. When he opened his eyes again, his club mates had really all turned into toddlers.

Honey was happily shoving sweets and anything that looked sweet into his mouth. Before he could eat the fancy colored chalks, Mori crawled to the rescue.

Meanwhile, just near the cousins sat the twins, who were having an intense mud ball fight. The ball would always miss the target, and something else would get dirty. To their delight, one ball accidentally hit Tamaki, who was playing with a huge rabbit doll.

Kyouya paused. That doll—it was his favorite toy. How could Tamaki have it? Wasn't Usa-chan enough?

As angry baby Tamaki dropped the doll onto the floor to chase the twins, Kyouya picked up the rabbit and hugged it.

Just for one second, he wanted a break from the nightmare. Candy wrappers, soil and knocked over items were here and there. Now that they were actually babies, he knew he had to clean up the mess later.

"Senpai," he thought he heard the doll spoke.

"Kyouya-senpai." This time it was more like choke.

"Kyouya-senpai!"

He opened his eyes to find a petite woman in kitchen clothes tightly wrapped in his arms. It took him a second before he realized it was Fujioka Haruhi, and he released her.

She panted. "Kyouya-senpai, I didn't expect you of all people to fall asleep at a place like this. Really, you guys are getting way out of hand. It's like I have to babysit all of you."

He lifted his face to see teenage Honey and Mori eating pocky and littering the boxes. On the other side of the room, Tamaki was having a food fight with the Hitachiin brothers.

And, he? He was on Haruhi's usual seat where Tamaki had just been.

He shrugged. Feeling drowsy, he made his way to the sofa and went back to sleep. Usually he would feel insulted to be likened to his peers, but this time, he liked it. He liked being the baby.

...ooOooo...

**6**

**With Haruhi near him, he knows he's loved by okama parents.**

He was sure he got the street right, the apartment right and the unit right. But what he wasn't sure of was whether he got the person right. Right before him stood an untrimmed man giving him an unwelcoming look. Moreover, the man was in men's clothes.

"What do you want?" the man barked with a cigarette in his mouth.

"Excuse me for my rudeness. I am Haruhi's club mate from Ouran, Ootori Kyouya, and I am here to see her father Ranka-san."

"Is that right?" The man flinched, as he eyed him from head to toe. "Give me a second," he said, and he disappeared.

He reappeared, this time wearing women's clothes, a wig and some pretty make-up. "I am sorry Kyouya-kun had to see me that way. I had a rough night you see, and my daughter left without warning me her school mate would come," he said gesturing him in. "And she also didn't tell me it would be a handsome one," he said giggling.

"Haruhi does not know I am here to see you," Kyouya said, smiling.

"Oh no? So why are you here? I hope she hasn't caused trouble in your club."

"Not at all. I am only here to acquaint myself with her relatives, so we know that she is well. Our members' welfare is of utmost importance to us after all."

"That's very thoughtful," Ranka replied, as they sat down. He looked relieved. "You know, Haruhi barely tells me anything about school, I was worried she might not be having a good time. Her host club, for one, is among my biggest concerns. The last thing I wanted was to know she was around crazy boys who only fawned over her because she's too adorable. I had imagined an annoying, irresponsible and abusive president who does nothing but look pretty all day and gives her nothing but extra trouble.

"But seeing you now is definitely reassuring. I feel better now."

"I am glad to hear that, but if I may, perhaps a weekly phone report about her exploits would make you feel even more reassured."

"My, can you be any more wonderful? Then I guess I shall leave my daughter under your care."

...ooOooo...

**7**

**With Haruhi near him, anything else "instant" is possible.**

The day she introduced commoners' coffee was the day he proposed the "Instant Project" to the Ootori company. All he needed was she to make the entire thing all the more convincing.

"We want to please our customers in the fastest possible way. Some people just cannot afford any time to waste, so they prefer anything instant.

"You will find that with the right material, it is possible. The end result will also be beyond satisfactory."

He took out his phone. "Allow me to present to you one very powerful example. With one phone call—no, even just a text message, I can make the sons of three of the most influential families in Japan appear in this room in the blink of an eye."

_"Access to Haruhi's middle school yearbook for the first man to get inside the Ootori Building Room 203."_

And his proposal was accepted just as instantly.

Imagine the things he could do if only Fujioka Haruhi were instant too.

...ooOooo...

**8**

**With Haruhi near him, the faeries visit more often.**

He woke up on a leaf surrounded by rainbow-colored glitters. Beside him lay a short, slender girl with silky black hair and creamy white skin. She was beautiful, but he realized she was also inanimate—a statue.

"Kyouya-sama, we hope you don't mind. She is a gift from the King."

Usually he would mind. Sitting up, he looked at her for a moment then at the minute creatures before him. "Faeries-san, I don't mean to be rude, but this has been your tenth visit."

"You have found favor with the King. We are therefore here to please you at any cost, remember?"

"How could I have possibly found favor with His Majesty when I do nothing and lie here all day?"

"This is the city where love is almost impossible—where men and women shun each other—but you are one of the great few who have fallen into it."

"I don't recall becoming like that lovesick idiot."

"So you may say. But why have you not complained about Fujioka Haruhi taking up half of your bed space the moment you woke up?"

He smirked. "She is not the real thing."

"Are you disappointed?"

His face gave nothing away, but the faeries giggled nonetheless.

"We will be back, Kyouya-sama. And we promise we'll keep coming back until you get the real Fujioka Haruhi."

Giving no reply, he stared at them curiously, as they flew away. For once, he didn't mind their coming back soon. They did, after all, do something interesting though he wouldn't call it love: Fujioka Haruhi.

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_A/N: My classes are about to begin, so I don't know when exactly I can post the next set, but I'll surely update. **If you did like this though, please leave a review/follow for me? **;) They definitely help in encouraging me to update, as they appear in my inbox as constant reminders. I think I can (ahem) sacrifice (make productive) a few break times at home (aka idle times) for writing instead of studying (oversleeping, eating) anyway. **I'd also love to hear some merits for Kyouya from you since the goal of this fic is to prove the "infinite" merits anyway—the more merits, the merrier!** Although these are just drabbles, I'm hoping they can make a story when pieced together (hence, the chapter title)—the merits as well as the romantic feelings get deeper as each chapter goes. Thank you! :)_


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